We are pregnant! Words cannot describe how blessed we feel. We are excited, a little scared and so grateful to our Lord. We prayed and God answered. We are expecting a baby (A MIRACLE) on February 3, 2010.
One morning I decided to take a home pregnancy test. I had thought it might be too early to take it, but thought, owell, I'll just do it anyway. Sure enough, it wasn't too early...and a positive test is what I found!!! I picked up the stick, having not gotten too worked up because I didn't expect a positive this early, and looked, and there before my eyes was 2 pink lines. THE BEST PICTURE EVER!!
I took the test, walked out of my bathroom and fell onto my bed in our room. Staring up at the ceiling, I began to let it sink in, and as soon as it did, tears began to fall, TEARS OF JOY! Tears that meant only sheer happiness, blessings had been given to me by my Savior, my Lord. Our Lord had heard us, he showed favor to us, and he blessed us with a gift of life. This life, as tiny as it was, was ours. This life, this gift, growing way deep inside, was so small, so tiny, and yet the impact that it had on my heart, my soul, was in no way small, no way tiny. For even with just a flicker of heartbeat, this tiny being made my heart beat stronger, it made me feel more alive.
All I could do for the next 10 minutes was lay there staring at the ceiling and thanking God for those 2 pink lines, for this life, and for never failing me. Then it occurred to me how often my husband Chris would say, "It's going to work." "We're going to get pregnant this first time, I know it." He would say those words, and then also remind me that he had faith it would work. He would remind me to remember my faith, and to HOLD ONTO MY FAITH. So while I stressed often that perhaps it might take months or even years, he rest assured that faith would make it happen, and God did.
Still laying there I felt so blessed, now for this new life, and for my husband who's faith was so strong. I eventually rose up out bed with this new found excitement, I fluttered around the house, as if I had wings to carry me from one spot to the next, I just flew around. I imagined all sorts of things, just as any woman would who had discovered she was expecting.
I put together 2 gifts for Chris to open when he returned home from work. This first box held a fame. Inside the frame was all sorts of baby wording. And in the middle of the wording was a verse, "For with God, all things are possible". Mark 10:27. Then in the other box was a black and white photo of baby feet with the words Dreams Come True, and stuck behind the photo was the pregnancy stick! I could hardly stand the waiting.
Finally the door open and shut and I knew my love was home. I led him upstairs to our music room (which will be the nursery) and told him I had 2 early birthday presents. He was surprised and excited. He opened the frame first, and said joyfully, "Does this mean your pregnant", I of course did not answer, and told him to open the next gift. With a huge smile on his face, and a huge smile on my face, he opened the next box. He pulled out the picture, looked at me and then turned over the picture to find the test! He repeated his question, and I answered, YES!!! He quickly placed the gifts down, jumped up and embraced me. With me in his arms he looked at me so sweet and told me how excited he was. His face glimmered with happiness.
We spent that night and the next night after night, day after day, so thankful, so blessed, and so excited, and happy. There are still those scary thoughts in the back of our mind that life can be taken from us at any moment, and we do not take for granted one day, one hour, or one minute. We are holding onto our faith and trusting God to carry us through this pregnancy. Every day I pray that God keep this baby healthy and me healthy.
There are a few songs that are really speaking to my soul, they are drawing me closer to my personal Father, Savior, Friend and GOD. I want to share them. I am sorta struggling with a little thing right now, and really having to trust in God and believe that his will is best. I must trust that he knows best and he will NOT FAIL ME.
