1 Month Old

Wow, the time flies. You are already 1 month old. We have had quite the journey to get you here, and you are now 1 month old, and we have loved every second, even the times when you cry your little heart out, and the times when we are fighting just to keep our eyes open. We love you so much baby boy.

You are now weighing about 9.13 lbs and are really beginning to settle into your new home here with your mommy and daddy. We are starting to get the hang of caring for you, which is all consuming, but we adore you, so it's all worth it. You seem to cry the most between 5 PM-7PM, we are not sure why, but we just try to comfort you. You begin your mornings in a pretty good mood, ready to take on the day...and I need a cup of coffee, and a shower, but we fake till we make it! Daddy and I are always tired, but that's parenthood we hear.

In the mornings I feed you (you are nursed) and then change you and get you dressed. You like this part, you are usually wide eyed and happy. You are eating every 2 hours about. In the evening time lately, we are bathing you, massaging you (I do this --you love it), nursing you and trying to put you to bed. You love the bath, (you must get this from me, I love, love, love bath's!!!). You get tired around the time I massage you (I use the sleepy time lotion-Johnson's and Johnson's) and you barely can keep your eyes open. I think it is really sweet and every night, I hope and pray it makes you really tired and that you fall asleep easily and sleep really well. You sometimes can sleep up to 4 or 5 hours at a time, which is awesome.

You make noises and move your arms around allot when you are drifting off to sleep. You also love your pacifier, and we give it to you allot, but when you don't want it, you spit it out. We hold it in your mouth allot when you are upset or really tired, you like that, and it helps you.

When you are active, and alert, which you seem to be very much at certain times of the day, we love watching you. We are in love with your little noises and look forward to hearing more.

You are still weating a few of your newborn outfits but starting to wear your 0-3 clothes too. I love dressing you in cute outfits and I take tons of pictures of you. I can't stop snapping away! You will be happy though when you are older and have allot of pictures. I was adopted and only have like 1 or 2 pictures of when I was a baby, so I can't help but capture everything.

You make the cutest faces, we love them!!! Are most favorite of all, of course, is your smile. You have the cutest smile. Your "Mom Mom" says that you make allot more facial expressions and that you are more alert than most babies.

You are long, and we think you will take after your Daddy in height, thank goodness because I am short. Your hair is gorgeous! You have allot of it. The color is medium brown, but when you were born it was more of a dark brown.

We love you so much Tristan, we are so blessed to have you. We are praying for you and thank the Lord for you daily. We are treasuring every moment.

Gracie's Got A New Friend

So we really weren't sure how Miss Gracie was going to handle the new baby. We were told by most that she probably would do well, but many also worried that she wouldn't, as she was very much used to allot of attention, and let's face it, I totally spoiled her. She was my baby girl forever, and I was not sure what to think. But since the day we brought Tristan home she has been so sweet to him. He is her new best friend, of course I will always remain her favorite.

She is always still following me around and wants to be at my side all the time. But if I am with Tristan, she is as close to him as she can possibly get. It is sweet, and I am so relieved that she is taking to him so well.

Your First Bath

Your first bath (well actually it was a sponge bath) went, well, not so great. You hated it, and cried the entire time. Which I guess you just didn't like it maybe because you were not in water, but being just sponged down. who knows! I gave you the bath and your Daddy video taped, so when you are older you can see it. I can't say it will be very enjoyable though, you seriously cried the entire time. The only time you let up a little wailing is when we washed your hair, and you did a little better at that point.

Owell, at least you like bath time now.

Bringing You Home

When the Dr released you and I to go home, we were so excited. I started getting dressed and Daddy started calling our parents and a few friends to let them know we were coming home. Then we packed up our gifts we had recieved and my hospital bag and got you dressed in your special take home outfit. You looked so cute! We loaded everything on a cart, Daddy pushed it and the nurse pushed me in a wheel chair out to the car. Daddy was so excited! He came running back to the hospital with the empty cart and then ran really fast back to the car (it was cold outside). He pulled up in the car and helped get you in the car seat, and he did great. Then nurse helped me in the car, then accidentially slammed my finger in the car, ouch!!! It hurt real bad, but I was on some meds, thank goodness, or it might have been allot worse.

You did pretty good in the car. I sat in the back seat with you. It was weird (but great) driving with you. We had waitied for you to fill that seat. We stared at the empty seat for weeks waiting for you baby. We were so happy you were with us and we were taking you home. I was nervous to be in the car with you. I knew Daddy was a great driver and that he would be extra careful, but the other drivers, well, I wasn't so sure of. I again had to remain faithful.

We arrived home, my parents there to greet us and help out a little bit. They were there with dinner (camping chicken-yummy, and helped us unload the car. They held you while your Daddy and got settled in at home. We realized quickly that I and you would have to stay in the guest room for awhile (which we did until you were about 5-6 weeks) because I couldn't get in and out of the bed in our room. So we set up camp in the guestroom. Your Daddy helped me in the shower and into bed and slept in the room with us for a few nights.

Your first night home was very hard. We both said to eachother that we probably should have stayed one more night at the hospital, which we could have, but decided to leave early. Most c-sec mommies sta 4 nights, we stayed 3 (6 total though-counting labor). You cried allot, we thought probably because of your sourroundings, you poor little baby, you were probably scared. You ate every two hours and your Daddy and I kept track (writing down) everytime you ate, peed and pooped. It was allot to keep up with. We did this to give to your Dr. You got better though after a few days, and you didn't cry nearly as much.

Becoming "DAD"

Chris was awesome during my pregnancy. He remained so calm (most all the time), he gave me strengh, he made me smile and laugh, and he prayed constantly. He and I had a rough couple of months, and stayed faithfull to God and our marriage was blessed through this journey.

The few days before going in for the induction, his had a look on his face of "I'm ready", and I loved it. I loved seeing his excitement. I asked him often if he was worried or scared, or nervous, and he would always reply that he trusted God and that he was just ready.

On the day of the induction, he was great. He was very supportive and happy. During the days of labor he was an amazing husband and friend. I am forever blessed to have his support during that time, and I am so in love with him! He was so strong and faithfull during the wait and made me feel calm when I needed him the most.

After having Tristan he was changed, and he became more gentle, and I love seeing him in his new role of "Daddy". I love wathching him interact, care and love his baby son. I am so blessed to have him.

A Mother's Touch

I wasn't sure whether I would have my mother in the room during labor. I told her that I might and that I would let her know when the day came. I did, and I mean I really, really did. Even when your 32 years old, you still somehow need, very much, the loving touch and comfort that only your own mother can provide.

The days when I was in labor, my worst day, and the other days, she was there. She was there to pray, to hold my hand, to cry for me out in the hall because she felt so deeply for me, she longed to make my pain disapear. She smiled and gently told me I was doing well. I cannot begin to express my sincere gratitude for her ability and desire to comfort me during those days of pain like I had never experienced in my life. Yes, Chris was there, and he was amazing, and strong, and a sweet and kind husband, holding my hand too, praying too and comforting me, but it was somehow different. Not any better or worse, just different.

I am so happy and blessed to have had her loving support those days and hours that dragged on for what felt like forever. I am also so blessed for the support of my Father, who I was told by my mother, prayed everyday of my pregnancy for me, and Baby Tristan. I am forever blessed by thier sweet spirit that helped them stay awake to remain at my side and in the waiting room area during the surgery, and not leaving the hospital until 2:30 AM. Those memories of having my Mother there will always remain in my heart, I will never be able to thank her enough for the gentleness of her touch, for the hours spent on her knees praying, for her smiles that lit the dark hospital room up and reminded me I was ok, for the special ways of encouraging me, and most of all for her willingness to adapt to my every changing moods.

After having Tristan, I was so proud and excited to introduce her and my Father to the grandchild they prayed for and the son I prayed for, thiers and my miracle, Tristan Dean Andel.

I love you in more ways than I could ever express. My love for you deepens as my days progress. Our long or short talks inspire me, give me hope, and make me smile. You are always there, and for this and SO MUCH MORE, you are amazing. I am so blessed to have you as my Mother, and one of my BEST FRIENDS.

Thank you. I love you.

Any Day Now

At the end of my pregnancy I was really starting to feel like,"any day now" would be great for you to come and join us. We had tried very hard for so long to keep you in the womb, healthy, safe, and happy. I took so many meds, shots, and stayed on bedrest to make sure that you would enter this world healthy and at a reasonable age...well did you ever!

However, those last few weeks and days, I treasured, absolutely, but let's face it, I was also pretty much at the limit of skin streching ability, exhaustion, and barely fit into my maternity clothes. It took a long time just to wiggle out of bed, and I peed ALL the time. You laid very low in my tummy, and I hurt allot, due to the weight of you, but don't every worry, you were completly worth it. I would do it ALL again, even if it was worse (not that it could be worse-I'm telling you--I had it rough)!

But as tough as it was, I was so blessed, God had given us a miracle, and that miracle was YOU!

Fighting the Lights-Tristan's Jaundice

After you were born, the Dr at the hospital told us that you had jaundince.

Neonatal jaundice is a yellowing of the skin and other tissues of a newborn infant. A bilirubin level of more than 85 umol/l (5 mg/dL) manifests clinical jaundice in neonates whereas in adults 34 umol/l (2 mg/dL) would look icteric. In newborns jaundice is detected by blanching the skin with digital pressure so that it reveals underlying skin and subcutaneous tissue. Jaundice newborns have an apparent icteric sclera, and yellowing of the face, extending down onto the chest. This condition is common in upwards of 70% of newborns.

This was one memory that haunts me, it was horrible and so difficult. I cannot even begin to tell you how hard it was to hear that you had it, and then go through photo light therapy to heal it. That 24 hour period lasted forever to us, it felt more like days than just 24 hours. You hated it, and I mean HATED it! You were so small and only wanted to be held and comforted and couldn't. It broke us to peices seeing you so upset. You had to lay on a bed of light and under lights and where goggles (we kept them for you to see when you get older). You kept movin your tiny head so the goggles wouldn't stay put, and you would cry and cry. Most of the time Daddy stood above you, holding the goggles on you and your perfect little hands, it was his way of trying to keep the goggles on and provide some type of comfort to you. Sometimes you would be ok, but most of the time you weren't. When it was time to feed you, I would pick you up with the light bed under you, and had to nurse you this way everytime.

The nurses made me worry everytime they took you back to get checked for your bili levels, and Daddy and me prayed that you would be healed of it, and wouldn't have to be under the lights anymore. This time truly tested our faith, our patience and made us realize more and more how deeply, deeply we loved you Baby Boy.

Finally the Dr realeased you from photo therapy and told us you would be able to go home. Words cannot describe our emotions at that point. Daddy had prayed so hard and hoped so much to take you home, he was soooo ready to take you home. We were so releived and so excited that you were better.

Our First Moments Together

The first time I held you so many emotions ran through my mind. I was so relieved that you were here, in my arms, safe, healthy and beautiful. I couldn't believe it! You were so small, so soft, and so innocent. I loved every part of your being. I forgot so quickly that I had gone through so much pain to get you here. In our first moments together I knew you were my miracle, my gift from God. Oh, Tristan, will you ever know how much that first moment meant. You are so special to me, I love you so dearly. I forgot that I had just been cut open so that you could come into this world. I wish I would have been able to see you open your eyes for the very first time, but I was able to hear your first cry. Oh how I treasured that sound, that sound was heavenly, it was what I had longed to hear forever. You cried and my heart opened more, it opened more so that I could love more. I cried too, I couldn't hold my emotions back. We were so blessed baby boy. We loved you instantly when we found out we were pregnant and loved you even more when we saw you the first time. You were a big boy, a whoping 10 lbs you were! We were shocked! We never expected you to be so big. I had been on bedrest for all of the pregnancy basically and did eat my fair share of Milky Ways :) but still, we didn't expect 10 lbs. But nevertheless, we were in love! A chubby little face, you had, and barely opening your eyes, the world was so big and scary I am sure, coming from your nice and small home in my womb. But baby boy, this world, as scary and big as it is, it is full of so many new and exciting adventures yet to discover. You are going to be amazing! You are a miracle, never forget that! Your father and I were scared often that we would never meet you, God had other plans. God held you in his hands, as he still does and will always. I pray that you seek him all the days of your life. I pray that you make him your very, very best friend.

He Smiled At Me

Tristan is about 6 1/2 weeks old today. Last night he did amazingly well. I gave him a bath at around 11:30, massaged him with Sleepy Time Lotion and nursed him. I had hoped he'd fall asleep shortly after I fed him, but he took a little longer to fall asleep than I had hoped. He finally went into his basinett around 1 am, which is awesome compared to drifting off around 3 AM, which is what he normally does. We too went to sleep. I thought for sure he would wake up around 3 or 4 AM to eat, or around 6, but he slept till a 7 AM!!! I couldn't believe, or maybe I did wake up with him, but I was so tired that I don't remember, but I am pretty sure he slept, I slept and Chris slept. IT WAS WONDERFUL! An answered prayer for sure. I think God knows when we just really need to sleep. Thank you God.

So, this morning after I fed him, he wasn't at all ready to just drift back into dreamland,so Chris took him into the guest room. He takes him in there to give me silence so I can sleep. It is impossible to sleep when he makes a noise every other second. I slept and they hung out. Of course later this morning, Chris told me that he fell back a sleep around 8:30 AM and slept till around 11 AM. Anyways, back to the point of this story. Chris brought him in our room (I was already up-showered and ready to feed him)it was about 12 PM. He was changing his diaper-and of course Tristan was crying because he was being changed and very hungry I'm sure. I walked over to him, looked at him and smiled and guess what...HE SMILED SO BIG!!! I know he recognized me, I just know it! He smiled so big and kept smiling. It was a moment I will never forget, he was so sweet, so happy. I love this baby boy.

A good reading

I Want to Leave a Legacy
9 Mar 2010
Melanie Chitwood

"I will sing of the lovingkindness of the Lord forever; to all generations I will make known your faithfulness with my mouth." Psalm 89:1 (NAS)

What do your children think of when they think of you? Their answers would be very revealing, wouldn't they? One day in early elementary school, Zachary came home with a Mother's Day picture he'd created for me. In the middle was a lovely portrait of me, wearing a dress made in my favorite colors of pink and purple. Then around the picture his teacher had told him to write four different words to describe his mom. He wrote: reading, napping, chocolate chip cookies, and laughing. His words made me smile with their accuracy.

Every day we are leaving our fingerprints on our kids. What do we want our children to think of when they think of their p arents? A mom who was gentle and firm in her discipline or a mom who flew off the handle easily? A mom who seemed permanently attached to her phone or a mom who was available for life's big and small moments? A mom who occasionally went to church or a mom whose love of God was a part of her everyday life?

A legacy can be defined as "something handed down." Every day through our words and actions we are developing a legacy to be carried in the character of our children. It's easy for the busyness of life to keep you from being purposeful in your parenting. Let's decide today to leave the legacy we really want. Let's make sure it's a legacy not born of busyness and urgency, but one born of purposefulness and prayer.

It always helps me to remember that God is a parent too. So who better to turn to for parenting advice? It also helps me to know that God loves my children even more than I do, and He will fill in the gaps for me and Scott as we seek Him first. No matter what kind of parent you've been, today you can decide to add to and improve the legacy you are leaving. These are the only days we have with our children. We don't get them back. Let's begin today to be the parents we really want to be.

Dear Lord, thank You so much for each of my children. I need Your help every day to be the parent You want me to be. Lord, I'm human and I know that as a parent, I've made mistakes and will in the future. Lord, redeem the past and strengthen me for the future. Lord, thank You that You will give me Your love, wisdom, strength, direction, and patience to be the best parent for my children. Help me to leave a legacy that brings You glory and one that will enable my children to know how much You love them. In Jesus' Name, Amen.

Related Resources:
This devotion was adapted from What A Wife Needs From Her Husband by Melanie Chitwood

What a Husband Needs from His Wife by Melanie Chitwood

Season of Change: Parenting Your Middle Schooler with Passion and Purpose by Rebecca Ingram Powell

Check out Melanie's blog for information about her upcoming marriage conference call, "Buildi ng a Marriage that Will Last a LIfetime." She'll be giving away a free conference call!

For more encouragement, read A Legend of Faith

Mining for Gold in the Heart of Your Child Character Chart and Message on CD, by Renee Swope

Application Steps:
Your children will learn to pray as they hear you pray. Pray with them on the way to school, throughout the day to thank God or to ask for His help, and tuck them in each night with your prayers. And don't stop praying with them when they're teens. Even though your teens may be pulling away from you, they still need to know you're covering them with prayer.

Choose a verse for the whole family to memorize each week. Display it in the kitchen or some other visible place.

Reflections:
Think about your everyday actions. Which of your actions point your children's hearts to the Lord?

Think about your attitude in frustrating or stressful situations. Are you modeling Christ's attitude in these situations?

What is one action step you can take this week to leave a legacy of faith for your children?

Power Verses:
Deuteronomy 6:5-9, "Love GOD, your God, with your whole heart: love him with all that's in you, love him with all you've got! Write these commandments that I've given you today on your hearts. Get them inside of you and then get them inside your children. Talk about them wherever you are, sitting at home or walking in the street; talk about them from the time you get up in the morning to when you fall into bed at night. Tie them on your hands and foreheads as a reminder; inscribe them on the doorposts of your homes and on your city gates. (Message)

Proverbs 22:6, "Direct your children onto the right path, and when they are older, they will not leave it." (NLT)

Psalm 79:13, "So we Your people, the sheep of Your pasture, will give thanks to You forever; to all generations we will tell of Your praise." (NAS)

© 2010 by Melanie Chitwood. All rights reserved.



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